This newspaper is generated daily by my (un)intelligent agent. For
more information on the newspaper's generation or if you have
questions/comments, please consult the Newspaper
Frequently Asked Questions list.
-Thanks, Aaron, proprietor of the Last
Homely House
This edition was generated on Thu Dec 20 08:45:02 EST 2007
BAGHDAD - U.S. soldiers found mass graves north of Baghdad next to a torture center where chains were attached to blood-spattered walls and a metal bed frame was still connected to an electrical shock system, the military said Thursday.
NEW YORK - Teenagers still value phone calls and face-to-face meetings with friends even as they frequent online hangouts like Facebook and MySpace, a new study finds.
IRVING, Texas - Terrell Owens has a message for Jessica Simpson: Stay away. The 27-year-old singer-actress has become Public Enemy No. 1 among Dallas Cowboys fans because of a link being made between her appearance at Sunday's game and the poor performance of her new boyfriend, quarterback Tony Romo.
SANFORD, N.C. - Pfc. Jason Scheuerman nailed a suicide note to his barracks closet in Iraq, stepped inside and shot himself.
AMERICAN FORK, Utah - Merry Christmas to you, Mary Christmas. That's what the former Mary Young is hearing this holiday season, after she married Brian Christmas earlier this year.
BOSTON - Boston Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling called on Roger Clemens to give up the four Cy Young Awards he's won since 1997 if he can't clear his name from allegations that he used steroids to prolong and enhance his career.
SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has made dramatic gains in California but still trails front-runner Rudy Giuliani, according to a poll released on Thursday.
JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) - South Africa's top prosecutor believes there is enough evidence to bring renewed graft charges against Jacob Zuma, newly elected head of the ruling ANC, a local radio station reported on Thursday.
BAGHDAD (Reuters) - A suicide bomber exploded a belt packed with explosives at a recruiting station for neighborhood patrols in Iraq's restive Diyala province on Thursday, killing 13 volunteers and wounding 10, police said.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The House of Representatives approved a $556 billion bill on Wednesday to fund most of the federal government through September 2008, ending a year-long budget fight with President George W. Bush by also including new money for the Iraq war.
GAZA (Reuters) - Israeli tanks and troops backed by helicopter gunships raided the central Gaza Strip on Thursday, killing at least four Palestinian gunmen, militant sources and hospital officials said.
PARIS (Reuters) - French police said on Thursday they had arrested eight men they suspect of providing logistical support to al Qaeda's North African wing in Algeria, confirming a report in French newspaper Le Figaro.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - President George W. Bush will hold a news conference at 10 a.m. EST on Thursday, White House spokeswoman Dana Perino said.
LONDON (Reuters) - A British resident released from Guantanamo Bay after more than four years in U.S. custody appeared in court in London on Thursday to face possible extradition to Spain on terrorism charges.
POLOKWANE, South Africa (AFP) - Jacob Zuma, the new leader of South Africa's ruling ANC, faced being charged with corruption on Thursday as his defeated rival Thabo Mbeki quashed speculation he would quit as president.
SEOUL (AFP) - South Korea's next leader Lee Myung-Bak on Thursday promised pragmatic policies aimed at revitalising the economy and persuading North Korea to denuclearise and improve its rights record.
UNITED NATIONS (AFP) - The UN Security Council failed to break the impasse over Kosovo Wednesday as Western envoys said further talks between the parties would be pointless and that the status quo in the breakaway Serbian province is "unsustainable."
GAZA CITY (AFP) - The Israeli army killed four militants in the central Gaza Strip on Thursday in the latest military operation in the Hamas-run territory, Palestinian medics said.
LONDON (AFP) - Queen Elizabeth II was set to become Britain's oldest monarch Thursday, overtaking her great-great grandmother Queen Victoria, although in discreet royal fashion no events were planned to mark the record.
LONDON (AFP) - Britain's Competition Commission recommended Thursday that media giant BSkyB should slash its holding in independent television broadcaster ITV to below 7.5 percent due to competition concerns.
WASHINGTON (AFP) - The US government declined to name China a currency "manipulator" but said in a report Wednesday that the Chinese yuan remains severely undervalued against the dollar.
ROVANIEMI, Finland (Reuters) - Customer service, story-telling, nature studies and wilderness survival are essential skills for any elf worthy of the name.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The United States remains unprepared for disasters ranging from biological attacks to a flu pandemic, and funding for preparedness is falling, according to a report released on Tuesday.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A fire damaged Vice President Dick Cheney's ceremonial office in a building overlooking the White House on Wednesday and forced more than 1,000 government workers to evacuate.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - U.S. intelligence shared with Turkey led to the weekend raids in northern Iraq on Kurdish militants, Turkey's ambassador to the United States said on Wednesday.
POLOKWANE, South Africa (Reuters) - South Africa faced deep uncertainty on Wednesday after the greatest political shake-up since the end of apartheid set populist Jacob Zuma on the road to the state presidency.
DAVIE, Fla. - Bill Parcells has a home in South Florida. He's about to have a job there, too. Parcells and Miami owner Wayne Huizenga agreed Wednesday on a four-year contract to be the Dolphins' vice president of football operations, according to ESPN, which employs the two-time Super Bowl-winning coach as an analyst.
NEW YORK - Bear Stearns Cos., the No. 5 U.S. investment bank, said Thursday a bigger-than-expected writedown of its mortgage portfolio caused a substantial quarterly loss.